{"id":2815,"date":"2014-09-04T14:30:46","date_gmt":"2014-09-04T14:30:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/2014\/09\/04\/oh-my-god-clarence-theres-a-human-in-the\/"},"modified":"2014-09-04T14:30:46","modified_gmt":"2014-09-04T14:30:46","slug":"oh-my-god-clarence-theres-a-human-in-the","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/2014\/09\/04\/oh-my-god-clarence-theres-a-human-in-the\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

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“OH MY GOD. CLARENCE! <\/em>There’s a human in the kitchen and it’s fucking huge. It’s about the size of my pedipalp. Oh god they’re so fucking gross. It’s like a worm with a forked tail, how do they even stand on just two legs, it makes no sense. EW OH EW I can see its thingies, its fingers!! It’s got like a million fucking fingers. I’m not getting out of the shower til you kill it. Oh my god let’s just move, can’t we just move? Let’s just burn the house to the ground, it’s the only way to be sure.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“OH MY GOD. CLARENCE! There’s a human in the kitchen and it’s fucking huge. It’s about the size of my pedipalp. Oh god they’re so fucking gross. It’s like a worm with a forked tail, how do they even stand on just two legs, it makes no sense. EW OH EW I can see its … Continue reading “”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2815","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorised"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2815","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2815"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2815\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2815"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2815"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kaisercaimo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2815"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}